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Final Fantasy 13 Story Recap and Review (SPOILER ALERT)


Why do we play final fantasy or RPG’s in general?  To grind hours of our lives away, do we play for the gameplay, not really, (it has to be good and playable) but it could be mediocre and we still play through.  The main reason we play is to Role Play through some characters in an alternate type of world usually with a very compelling story.

Final Fantasy 13 did not deliver on this, I don’t give a crap if the battle system was their best to date,  or the graphics were the best, cause their only as good as the year they were developed meaning everyone will shit themselves for next Final Fantasy 15’s graphics.

Now let’s get into the meat of my beef, (again spoilers)

Characters,

Lighting– A complete bitch to everyone, who seems to have no emotion what so ever, many take her as a cloud rip off.  But at least Cloud had reasons behind his problems, my only logical reasoning is that this game started during her time of the month and lasted the entire duration of the game.

Vanille–  She is so F@$# annoying, I can’t help but think of a bad sex disease when I hear her name.  She tries to act nice but when Hopes mom just dies she basically tells him to cheer up and then says  ciao and leaves him, literally 5 mins after his mom just died.

Snow– What the hell is with Final Fantasy Names, its like they just go through a dictionary.  He’s  a complete douche bag, who’s full of himself even though he has no quality to be proud of, he’s the Colin Ferrell  of the group with his ski cap and douche bag goatee.

Sezh–  Token Black guy, actually this guy was pry the best mainly because he was supposed to be comic relief.  Even he seems lame compared to other characters throughout the franchise.

Fang– Another chick that is really annoying like Lightening.  Except she has a staff instead of a sword so you know she’s completely different.

Hope–  All these other characters pale in comparison to Hope.  How many of you like Tidus from FF10, I know a lot of people bitched about him.  How about Vaan from FF12  you hate that guy I know I did.  Well Hope is even worse than either of them.  I swear to god Square if you make another whining bitch for a character like this I will swear off the entire Franchise.  They didn’t even change his look, blond hair with the same style get some originality.

There are even more non player characters that are just as bad.

Dialogue

Terrible dialogue though out the entire series, sure they may sprinkle some moments here and there, but majority of it sounds like it was written by 11 year old boy who’s never read a book and only watched a few cartoons and has dyslexia.

You may have heard of some line such as this “Mom’s are Tough” well that was basically the icing on the whole shit sandwich you are about to eat, (and if you think icing on any sandwich sounds gross than you will completely understand)

Plot

Basically the government is Purging (killing) a bunch of people because they think they are L’cith (Servants , AKA Lepers) because they were touched by Fal’Cith (Gods).  The Fal’Cith are fighting a war against one another from Pulse (The world) and Cocoon (giant ship above the world).  So the fractions are Fal Cith of Pulse and the Fal Cith of Cocoon at ends.

If you get touch and turned into a L’cith or servant you are given a Focus (goal) if you don’t complete this focus you turn into the undead, if you do complete this focus you get turned into crystals which you may wish you were dead.  Either way you might as well kill yourself.  They also don’t give them many details on their focus except a cryptic vision that could mean anything or nothing depending on how the writers sway.

Snow’s underage girlfriend and Lightings Sister, Serah (not a typo) gets turned into L’cith.  He fights the government to stop the purge, Lighting is trying to going to the Fal’cith headquarters to get her.  Hope is dragged in by Snow’s army and blames him for his moms death, (not the army that was trying to kill them).  Sezh joins Lighting quest cause he’s upset his son was turned L’cith.  Vanille joins Hope and Snow.

They all meet up in Fal cith meet Serah, a speech about saving cocoon than she’s turned into a Crystal for filling her focus which was to bring them together.  The fal cith get them.

The group get turned into L’Cith and can now use magic, the government what’s them dead because they are racists, any logic they try to thrown into to explain this never is really explored.  Except the government says hate these people and somehow everyone just says “ok yeah”.  Even though they themselves could get turned into L’cith just as easily.

The group splits up, Vanille and Sezh – Hope and Lighting,-  Snow meets up with Fang another L’cith.

Sezh finds out his son was turned L’cith from Vanille trys to kill her. He can’t, tries to kill himself, which they try to make you think that he has but an hour later shows them he’s not dead.  Big Surpise.

Lighting gives Hope a knife (that her sister gave her on her birthday) to kill Snow, (why her sister would give Lighting a knife when she already has a sword gun thing, beats me).  Hope whines about missing his mommy, lighting bitches that she can’t be his mommy.

Snow finds the Crystal form of Serah trys to dig her out of more crystal and gets caught by Fang.  Is order to hunt other L’cith. With some army group with Cid Raines and some other guys that don’t matter.

Sezh and Vanille were captured, everyone comes to rescue them  they go to the flying airship meet Dynsly the cocoon President he’s a Fal’cith kills his entire officer including an annoying bitch that they only showed a few time before so she never become a threat like it seemed to foresee in the cut scenes.

After a lot of character development with free love and talk about hope, you find out the grand duke or whatever was a Fal Cith who wants you to kill Orphan (another god) so that the Maker (God of Gods) will come back.  By making Ragnarök to come to life and bring about Cocoons destruction.  Some how this will the Maker want to come back, all I know is if I was the Maker I would be so ashamed of the people that I would never want to come back.

Apparently Fang and Vanille are Pulse L’cith from like 100 years ago who were supposed to bring Ragnarök and failed.  Now they have to do it again. They go to Pulse because (Square had to have a open world otherwise the entire game would have been the most linear RPG ever).  They see stone Zombie L’cth says if they don’t full their focus they get turned into stones thing like this, which they use to run their side missions. A few hours they see another one than say  something that recants their previous statement and says it holds old memories which they access to loosely explain something about the plot that later will get thrown away at the end.

Back to cocoon they are greeted with army after they crash a race.  They convince the army that they aren’t the ones at fault. Than go after Dynsly or whatever the main Fal’cith is.

The end boss is a complete Emo who basically wants to die, (even though he fights you) than they do a spiel about saving cocoon even though killing Orphan is what the Fal’cith wanted out of them in the first place.  All the groups except Fang and Vanille get turned into the Zombie like L’cith, wait they get turned back somehow than talking about love and peace and more.  Hope says that the “Fal Cith has no power and they are just smoke and mirrors”  (Even though they made them have magic, killed 1000’s if not 10,000s of people in a blink of an eye. yeah just smoke and mirrors, I’m sure your mom isn’t really dead either after falling from that building.) Than after the heart warming speech and some weapon posing they fight Orphan.

So Orphan dies, than for no reason Vanille and Fang become Ragnarok and save cocoon (How? Doesn’t make sense but than again if you got to this point nothing does).  Serah and Sezh kid come back and Snow plans for his wedding with Serah. Vanille and Fang are shown as crystals after doing their focus. (even though everyone else was a crystal but got decrystalized they didn”t?  Whatever).   A song is played and everything is a happy ending, cue credits.  I just saved you 60 dollars and 50 – 80 hours of your life.

I know a few may think I simplified it, but it really wasn’t all that complex they just made it seem that way by making up new words and never explaining them.

Final Thoughts

The story sounds like it could be good, just it’s bogged down with unlikable characters, clones from other final fantasy characters, including a Sephiroth clone.  Terrible dialogue that is either not needed adds nothing to the story or characters development.  It’s delivery is just God awful, they took what really is a simple story and made it hard to understand and at times makes you scratch your head.  They are constantly making characters do things that make no sense or seem out of character, even for a game where the characters seem out of place is a feat all it’s own.

It seems they spent more time on the graphics and doing cut scenes with CG than actually have anything make sense, they had 3 years to develop a good story and this was the best they came up with,  this seems like the Michael Bay of the Final Fantasy.  This doesn’t please the hardcore RPG fan, doesn’t make it easy to understand for the newbie RPG fan, and the non RPG fan will just assume play and FPS instead of watching long winded talks and CG cut scenes that could have been cut out and not take anything away form the story.

I could grip for hours on this but, if you still feel like seeing for yourself go to youtube I am sure someone has it posted already.

I expected more out of Square Enix.  Lately they have had a lack luster of game quality coming out, Crystal Bearers anyone.  I know they could do better and have.  FF 4 After Years was good.   I hear they are already developing the next software engine for the new FF, now how about developing better writers along with that.

****** Update Last remarks

It’s been a few hours since I saw the end and wrote this and I am still fuming over this story it was just so bad.  I am not new to RPGs so my review isn’t a knock on them.  In fact I played RPGS since I was single digit age, starting with Dragon Quest, and Final Fantasy 6 was one that made me really get into RPGs and I never looked back.  I am also a big Japanese Anime fan so this is no way of me ripping on Japan way of story telling in general.

But let’s be honest anyone who could find this a gripping story or even coherent well they are just pry in disbelief on how bad it is must and have a batter wife syndrome.  This does not deserve a tripple A rating.

I’ve seen Michael Bay Movies with better scripts than this.

I’ve seen US Manga movies with more coherent stories.   Even MD Geist and Wicked City.

I watched Porns with more believable characters than this had.

Heroes after season 1 had better direction and more likeable characters.

I read hentai comics with more heart and were better in their story.

DC’s retcon of their universe each decade made more sense than this story.

Spider-man clone saga was better in delivery.

This game make Suda 51 stories seem transparent and easy to understand.

Phantasy Star Universe had better less cliche characters.

I’ve seen lifetime movies that made wife beating husbands look better than this group of characters.

God help me, Twilight has more appeal than this game.

I used to think FF8 was one of the worst Final Fantasy games, one that I never even felt like playing again after one playthrough which was over a decade ago, but somehow Square out did themselves with this craptrastic one.  I know alot of people like the game play (which is importatnt) but whats the point if it helps you get from point A to point B if point B is just crap.  All I can say is never just assume a game will be great from a company just because it’s a franchise and they are well known for being great and I would be cautious on getting the next Final Fantasy Game.  All we can do is hope and pray that they clean up their act and get some quality control.

Ok I think I vented enough.  If you still don’t believe me get the game than, nothing will stop you.

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  1. March 31, 2010 at 7:10 pm

    While I enjoy the game on its own level, I can’t really disagree with most of the statements said here haha

    • jettwinlock
      March 31, 2010 at 10:20 pm

      Yes but I know your use to generic Japanese stories, I think the major problem is that the story was catered to the Asian audience and not the Western ones, like their movie the Spirits Within another flop. I was just so dishearten with this one.

  2. n
    April 1, 2010 at 10:32 am

    I just finished the game and absolutely agree with you. The group keep saying we will not obey falcie, create our own focus and save cocoon but they did exactly what the falcie wanted them to do in the first place. Kill the bloody thing that they know if killed cocoon will be destroyed. Also if the stupid falcie wanted to die why fight back. Makes no sense at all. FFViii now feels like a Shakespeare play after this piece of crap.

  3. April 23, 2010 at 5:20 am

    ROFL! I semi agree.
    (Few typos though)
    People turn into L’cie thanks to the Fal’cie wanting people to do “Focuses”.
    And if they fail their focus they turn into Cieth.
    And the bad fal’cie is Barthandalus.
    And the black guy is Sazh.
    As for the ending, 79% of the things that happened didn’t make sense. xD
    I’mma do some missions tomorrow and see if the story will be unraveled a bit more.

  4. Dane
    June 13, 2010 at 10:16 am

    Have to agree. Though I enjoyed the game thoroughly, the story was the only thing bogging it down, along with it’s characters. The excess amount of made-up words that are hard to distinguish from one another is not helping either.
    They force you to read up, just to put everything into place. I came here to play a game, not do some homework…..

    And once you’ve gathered the strength to accept the story for what it is, they throw the ending at you. I did not get that one at all. It was presented beautifully and the music even made a little C’ith tear apeared in my eye, but in the end it felt empty and meaningless.
    It’s exactly as you say: incoherent and convoluted.

    It’s okay to have some whinny little emo characters, but make them play a big part alowwing to prove themselves along the way. Is a typical underdog-story that hard?

    Next time make a real bad guy, one that I love to hate, cause if his evil charms.
    And a good guy that I hate to love, despite it’s flaws.

  5. Name
    January 14, 2011 at 7:10 am

    Wow u just wasted 50-80 hours of ur life raging. mad bro?

  6. Carl
    January 14, 2011 at 7:11 am

    .

  7. All 6's and 7's
    July 31, 2011 at 6:45 am

    I have only played through to the 5th chapter, but i couldnt agree more. I read this hoping at some point you would say that somewhere during the story they would tie everything together and it would make perfect sense, but thats not the case.I fell in love with the FF for the stories. Square has completely dissapointed me, AGAIN!!! The last one i really enjoyed was 9, and the one’s that came befor(minus 8). I loved them because they were raunchy, the characters cursed, The main charachter was always a bad ass, there was great character development, etc. They need to bring those traits to the next game. Hopefully Versus will deliver. On a side note; What did you think of FF9???

    • jettwinlock
      July 31, 2011 at 12:06 pm

      I really enjoyed 9 up until I found out the main character was a clone, I actually sort of stopped, not because I hated it but I got occupied with something else and forgot about. So I never actually got to finish it.

      6 and 7 are my all time Favorites, I am actually replaying 6 or (Snes III) at this very moment. Final Fantasy 6 was really what got me in the Genre

      The sad truth is the original creator of FF left Square sometime ago and he has that new game out for wii The Last Story from his company Mist Walker. Much of the talent behind the Final Fantasy Games have all left. The only guy left was the man who made Kingdom Hearts who’s working on Versus now.

      Now the question is when will versus actually come out.

      Square lost their way when they pulled a George Lucas and tried to just make better graphics and not improve on story telling. RPGS are in the unique genre of games where Story telling actually trumps game play, compared to other genres, so when you lose the story you stop playing the game.

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